What Gets Lost in Underestimation.
This article is part of Finding the Words, a newsletter that delivers practical insights on the day’s issues.
Have you ever felt underestimated? As in: not good enough, not ready for the challenge, or not a fit for the role?
Maybe someone foolishly believed you were too old to contribute meaningfully to a project or too young to have something valuable to contribute. Maybe someone underestimated your knowledge, physical strength, or mental toughness to get through a challenging situation. Or maybe you underestimated yourself before you had a chance to succeed.
It’s easy to judge someone (including ourselves) based on what we believe are limitations. We hold each other back because of what we perceive to be faults rather than see and invest in what may be each of our greatest assets.
Recently I was conducting media training for a nonprofit executive who, I was told, needed significant support to be camera-ready. On the day of the training, I went in not knowing exactly what the issue was but aware that this person’s colleague saw something in them that needed fixing. As the day went on, I didn’t find a challenge, but a treasure. This executive was strong and compelling without ever raising their voice. They were confident and clear but also gentle in their delivery. They had a natural gift that many skilled spokespersons work years to hone: the ability to deliver a message without over-engineering the delivery. They were smooth, caring, and clear in their storytelling.
The person who was most underestimated was in fact, the most compelling storyteller I met all day.
How much of our underestimation is based on who we think we’re supposed to be rather than celebrating who we already are?
According to recent McGill research, more than 75% of employees consider effective, transparent communication as the most important characteristic any leader could have. Not stature. Not years of experience. Not physical presence or confidence but authenticity and sincerity. Yet, these are the very same characteristics we often underestimate in ourselves and each other.
It’s easy to count someone out when they don’t possess the typical qualities that we think they need—to be a good leader, to be an effective manager, to be camera-ready, to be a star student.
What if….
The next time you find yourself underestimating someone, pause and consider what you might be missing. What hidden treasure could be right in front of you?
Find it and celebrate it.
The older volunteer with the greatest wisdom.
The younger employee with the freshest perspective.
The gentle executive with the deepest empathy.
The quiet student with the most compelling ideas.
Alan Alda said: “Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in.” Now, that is a good reminder. We spend so much time seeing what’s wrong and what may be missing: in ourselves and each other, when the real treasure is often right in front of us.
Bottom line: Rather than try to fit everyone into a preconceived mold, let’s identify and celebrate the characteristics that make us each unique and special. In doing so, we can unlock the best in each other and in ourselves. So find what’s being underestimated, and celebrate it.
This post is part of the Finding The Words column, a series published every Wednesday that delivers a dose of communication insights direct to your inbox. If you like what you read, we hope you’ll subscribe to ensure you receive this each week.
